Marmaduke is dirty and neither his owner-man nor his owner-lady wants to wash him, both preferring to wash their minivan instead. As I personally would rather wash a car than any large dog, and as this scenario thusly seems to amount to little more than a mundane slice of life, I am concluding that today's Marmaduke has been ghostwritten by American Splendor creator Harvey Pekar, slumming it and floundering accordingly.

Marmaduke is colored by a lazy hack.

And, for that matter, written by a lazy hack.

And drawn by what appears to me to be a rotating team of lazy hacks.

Let me start over: Marmaduke is colored by an industry professional performing at precisely the appropriate level his assignment calls for.

Marmaduke broke his owner-family's heater in order to lure them into his cozy rapecabin (like a doghouse but with a chimney, and rape).

Marmaduke misses his testicles.

1. Marmaduke has been given a pet frog, despite being a pet himself.
2. Marmaduke takes this pet frog on walks, complete with tiny collar and leash.
3. These walks are conducted when Marmaduke himself is taken for a walk (by his owner-man).
4. As a frog travels via hopping (rather than walking), Marmaduke is seen hopping (rather than walking) during this particular walk/hop, most likely to mimic his pet's movement rather than out of necessity.
5. Marmaduke's owner-man is seen hopping as well, despite the fact that such hopping is embarrassing (explicitly) and unnecessary/inconvenient (implicitly).
6. Marmaduke is now published in color, even on weekdays.

All of this is absurd.