Marmaduke spots a smaller dog being toted around the block while on his afternoon walk, envies its portability and general lifestyle, decides he is sick of walking, and demands that Owner-Lady suck it up and carry him. Owner-Lady balks.

Marmaduke planned on eating dinner with his fat, elderly neighbors, but they are having something he doesn't like to eat and he flips a shit.

Marmaduke has been eating expired foodstuffs out of the refrigerator, which gives his breath an unpleasant odor. Owner-Man is more disgusted by Marmaduke's bad breath than he is by his dog eating out of the refrigerator. I don't know what the dandelions are for.

Marmaduke is dying.

Marmaduke ordered a pizza from 2 Ur Door Pizza! and tipped one of the delivery persons (2 Ur Door Pizza pizzas take two people to deliver them) a bone. As Marmaduke is a dog, and dogs consider bones to be very important and valuable, he no doubt was being earnest and generous in his offer, but the delivery boy has not encountered such before.

(A lesser strip would have pointed out the absurdity in a dog ordering pizza ("how can such a thing be?!?"), but the humor in Marmaduke is much more subtle and layered to settle for such an obvious chuckle. In the Marmadukiverse (c), this sort of shit happens all the time)

Marmaduke's fat, elderly neighbor-lady believes her phone to be ringing, but her husband tells her that it is probably one of Marmaduke's mobile phones (Marmaduke, for reasons still at large, owns a very large number of mobile phones).