Marmaduke and his owner-lady are so cold they are sprouting phantom broccoli stalks, a side-effect of early-morning chill unique to the Marmidukiverse™.

Marmaduke's plans for tonight are to eat lots of snacks and watch elephants fucking on TV.

Marmaduke has forgotten that he does not speak English.

Marmaduke's owner-lady refuses to put ice cream on his dog food, no matter how much he tickles her butt.