Marmaduke is staring intensely at one of his owner-lady's houseguests, interrupting the ladies' conversation and showing little regard for etiquette or personal space. Depending on the level of anthropomorphization one wishes to assign to Marmaduke, he is either being extremely rude, extremely threatening, a dog, or some combination thereof.

For the first time ever: JOE MATHLETE RECAPTIONS MARMADUKE!

"Marmaduke, what are you doing?"




"Marmaduke, stop it!"




"Marmaduke, shut up!"




"Marmaduke!"




"You're an asshole."

EXCITING ANNOUNCEMENT: T-SHIRTS ARE BACK!

Or will be back soon, like next week or so maybe once I figure a couple things out.

HOWEVER:


Not only will this fine beauty be available for commercial consumption once again; I will also be offering additional designs somewhat more appropriate to wear in front of your grandparents. Stay tuned this week, and make sure to get overly excited.

Joe Mathlete is going to not do this for a week

Next week: EXCITING ANNOUNCEMENT!

This week: NAPS!

Marmaduke destroyed or disturbed nearly every item in the house for reasons still at large. His owner-lady offers several hypotheses for the rampage that vary wildly in probability, failing to touch upon the most likely and obvious explanation (Marmaduke felt like it).

Marmaduke's fat, elderly neighbor has been huffing paint thinner again, which does not mix well with his Alzheimer's.

Marmaduke, in an exquisitely ironic bit of comical juxtaposition, is being disobedient on the way to obedience school.

Marmaduke's owner-man and owner-lady are not going to let him watch any more Fred Astaire movies, as they give him horrifically violent seizures.

Marmaduke is licking his owner-girl's mouth because it tastes like strawberries. Though it makes perfect sense for a dog to do this, I still find something about today's Marmaduke vaguely upsetting.

Marmaduke's owner-man, is taking Marmaduke out for a walk. Owner-Man asks Marmaduke to slow down, implying that their walk is a competition rather than exercise. Marmaduke invites Owner-Man (who appears to be suffering from mild cerebral palsy) to kiss his ass.